100 steps to happiness: The first step

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate… our deepest fear is that we are more powerful beyond measure”

Watching Coach Carter and his Richmond Oilers climb their way to victory is a great lesson to remind me that “playing small” serves nobody. The system is designed for me to fail, the system needs to be beaten. 100 steps of happiness is my daily tribute to finding and achieving happiness every day over the next 3-4 months.

This doesn’t mean I need to be consistently happy and walk around with the Joker’s smile on my face. It means that I should strive to find a bit, a step towards happiness in at least one moment during my day.

I woke up in a terrible state. I had the most amazing, fantastical dream where the man of my dreams demanded me back, apologised for making a mistake and we moved forward together. To wake up alone, and broken hearted after that was humiliating, emotional and confusing.

The day steadily progressed with my journalism project not working out the way I’d hoped. My team wasn’t in sync and I was still in a foul mood from earlier this morning. I couldn’t wait for the day to be over, I hated that this week was flying by which means that the stress of returning to work and all the problems there, were nearing.

But I forced myself to start writing again, committing myself to 100 blog posts over the next few months because logic knows that whatever I internalise must come out in some form- rather let it be a creative output.

My dad was surprised at what his new ringtone was when I played it for him. Rowan Pope is my dad- despite his issues he want’s nothing better than for his daughter to be the greatest. But most importantly, he says this to her when she decides to throw her future away over a boy:

“You have to be twice as good as them to get half of what they have. For God’s sakes. You know to aim higher…At the very least you could have aimed for chief of staff. Secretary of State. First Lady — do you have to be so mediocre?”

The segment of the episode I’m referring to can be found here.

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An awkward start

This is not going to be easy. I’m one of the most cynical people I know but it starts with the first step. So on this first day I decide to stop being mediocre. My nickname in varsity wasn’t first lady, it was Mrs President. I am going places- what I have control over is how fast I get there and what impact I have on those around me.

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