If my life were a novel, it would be pretty easy to find it at the bookshop. You’d skip past the sci-fi and the vampire obsessed Young Adult section, way past the romance… keep going, snicker at the anxious OCD business woman who’s raking the shelves at self-help and head straight to the Drama section where you’d expect to pull out a glittery purple book with black pages and silver writing. Sounds like a terrible idea right? Thank goddess that’s all changed.
My book definitely didn’t make the Bestsellers in 2012, so in 2013 I decided to spare the trees and go digital. Here I could be a bit esoteric and quirky and my life could change on a whim. Of course it meant that only random people would be interested in it…possibly because it was free to download on Kindle, but it meant that the book of life was really all about me writing it, me living it as opposed to how other people would respond to what I’d lived.
I think I’m happy with the pages I’ve written so far, I may not have written all 50 000 words as I’d wished but I was close and I’m on my way to achieving my goals. You have to understand, this is a huge step for me. Usually when I don’t achieve everything, exactly the way I envisioned it, with everything checked off my list, my mind reacts like a virus-ridden computer and I shut down and go haywire. So for me to be content, satisfied with what I’ve done and recognize the hard work that went into 2013 is a great step to self-improvement.
So in 2014, begins the sequel to my e-book, keeping with that same steady commitment to constantly updating my writing. It’s time to work in more happiness, more goals and perhaps have my heroine who’s saved herself in the previous story now work towards enjoying her happily ever after. That is definitely going to be a hard one to write. No one ever writes about the Happily Ever After, because frankly there’s no climax- it’s boring. I’m going to challenge myself to write happiness into the monotony of life.
Last year, I needed to say “No” a lot, to protect myself, to be selfish and to work on and focus on all aspects of me. This year, it’s going to be nerve wrecking but I’m going to try and say “Yes”- not in terms of being a doormat but rather being positive and confident enough, to take risks and experience happiness as much as I can. Yes to breaking down walls, yes to unsticking myself from emotional messes, to be easy and like in my previous post– to be congenial and tranquil much like the element of Air that I have such an affinity to. I have to trust that the more I say Yes to life, the more life will reply in the same way to me.