Throwing regrets in the bonfire…

I’m normally very good at keeping the Sabbats, remembering them and honouring them. Unfortunately I happened to miss out on Lammas this year, for Kanye West- which I believe is a valid excuse (I’m lying to myself).

The second of February brought about the harvest season, where back in the old days- I’m talking centuries ago, the harvest was really important. Now stuck in central Jozi, I don’t exactly care about seasons and storing crops unless it will somehow affect my wardrobe or electricity bill. So how does a modern day pagan celebrate? By mourning the end of summer and those things are all going to start dying? Quite depressing.

The goddess is aging, no more the carefree maiden she was. The days are shortening and nights grow longer. It’s a time for weddings and reuniting with loved ones to hold as the days get colder. It’s a time of thanks giving and appreciating what I have and hold dear to me, to feel blessed by who and what I have around me- which, let me tell you, is aplenty.

I am looking forward to autumn, by far my favourite season- slightly conceited as I was born in it. The colours and the unpredictability of the season always inspire me. It is warm and cold, that perfect balance between being wet and dry. I don’t have to mourn summer just yet, nor fear eminent winter.

Next week it’s Ash Wednesday, and I love what the season of Lent brings. It is all about discipline and being resolute in your beliefs. I’ve sworn off meat, as I always do to detox my body, and involuntarily sworn off sexy time too… not looking forward to that suffering. Alas it is a time of self-sacrifice and hard work.

Although I gained many new experiences over the past year, I also lost hard on things- especially myself and my personal relationship with my family. I didn’t sacrifice enough, but now is the time to do so and work towards a better me. I always planned to live life without regrets, but that was an immature thought, Regrets are needed so that mistakes aren’t repeated again. There are so many parts of me that need to grow and I need to focus on, and while I am remorseful I need to work towards making them happen and ripen over time.

So I say farewell. Farewell to the nyolz and bad behaviour, farewell to the fiend and the ratchet actions of my past. You are not needed anymore; I can do bad (in a good way) all by myself.

 “We cannot know what we have not experienced”


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